Well... a couple of nights ago... we had a fight... normally I wouldn't "air our dirty laundry to the world" but this really is a good story... and she's on
I am always... ALWAYS... cold. I hate the sound of the fan and I absolutely detest the wind blowing in my face while I sleep.
She is always... ALWAYS hot... She loves the sound of the fan and the fact that it covers up any "sounds of the dark" and she loves having air blown on her... especially while she sleeps.
You see... our fight started the night before... I woke up and was freezing... it was 65 in our San Clemente home and all the windows were open to allow the cool ocean mist to flow through the home. I got up to take some meds at 3 am... and I turned off the fan. The next night she kindly asked me not to... because she woke up hot (ok... this is where I'm going to plead my case to the public... HOT??? Are you kidding me? It's 65 degrees... that's colder than most people run their air conditioning... ugh...) So... in slightly kinder... ok maybe not... mmm... in slightly blunter words I explained my situation... I am always freezing... why does she get to be the one that wins with the fan??? Why can't we switch off and some nights have it off? Why can't we just relax in the 65 degrees???
She then informed me that I can do whatever I wanted for the next five days while she is on
So... Here's where this story gets funny... I was awakened early early this morning (before the sun came up) by some "sounds of the dark" Now... mark it in stone that I'm the brave sister... I get up and check out whatever sounds of the dark she hears. She insists that I do so. "what was that noise?!?!" she'll whisper to me as she turns on her light "It's the cat" or "I rolled over" I'll say.
Well this morning I needed no whisper to hear the noise that was piercing through the quiet night all I could hear was... HEAVY HEAVY snorting... Kinda like a pig. Chatelaine stretched her legs and blinked a few times trying to get the sleep out of her eyes she was obviously not thrilled about being awoken in the early morning either. Her little cat body looked terrified as I got up to check on this LOUD... VERY LOUD SNORTING. "Chate" I whispered, "what is that noise?!?!?" Quickly I thought up a plan... It's obviously outside... and it's probably that awful animal that keeps eating all of my almost ripe tomatoes... grrr... It's probably the one that knocked my corn down last year... grrr... "SNORT SNORT" it got louder... Quick... turn on the lights... scare it away with light! This was a great plan...
All I could think was... I wish I had turned that stupid fan on... then I wouldn't have been able to hear anything... (P.S. never buy a fan called "The Blizzard" and expect it to be quiet despite it's claims to be very quiet... don't you hate it in stores when they have all the fans on display and they are playing loud music and you are trying to figure out which one is loudest?) I turned on ALL the lights in my room and the outside light and the sun-room light and the bathroom light... I figured that if it got bright enough "the creature" would go away...
Soon thereafter... I couldn't hear it... Chatelaine laid back down and closed her eyes... and I turned off all the lights... I heard it shuffle past my bathroom window and I yelled "shew shew!" The stupid thing woke me up of course I am going to chastise it!!!! Well... this wasn't the best idea... I apparently spooked the "poor thing" and then I figured out what it was... No... I didn't see it... but I SURE DID SMELL IT!
So... needless to say... I've been up for an hour and a half with every window in the house open... and the cool morning breeze couldn't seem to blow any slower.
And to think... this could have all been avoided if I just had the fan on to cover up "the sounds of the dark". Oh my sis is going to have a hay day with this one... and I'm sure we will have a good laugh.