Thursday, June 7, 2012

Love

Sorry dear friends that I have been a little MIA during this healing process...

It has been much more emotional than I expected. 

Yes... I am doing well... Extremely well... If you had told me 6 months ago that I would be walking, hiking, swimming without a cane or walker I would have told you that you must have been insane. But, here I am... a living testament to God's grace in my life. 

I am a miracle. 

Thanks to a TON of physical therapy, a wonderful therapy puppy, an awesome chiropractor, and a wonderful neurologist, I am doing amazingly well. 

I don't struggle up the stairs, or walking down a slope, or bending over. My legs are working... my hands haven't been as numb... and my tremors have mostly stopped. 

I still have quite a sensitivity to heat... and with the summer months approaching I have had more difficulties with my vision and hearing... but hopefully that will get better with time too. 

Now... I find myself struggling with the desire to do more, to have more... this isn't enough... walking isn't enough... running isn't enough... I want MORE. 

Shouldn't I just be grateful?

Why is it so hard to be content?

My storm is over... the sky is turning blue... and here I find myself missing something... 

I have had this overwhelming feeling... absolutely overwhelming... to the point of tears sometimes. 

There is this hole in my heart... Someone is missing. 


I want someone to love. I want to share my life. I want someone to pray with and to pray for. Someone to challenge me in my faith. Someone who will push me closer to my Savior. Someone who will strive to grow closer to Him every day... Someone who wants to share the gospel with everyone around them. 

I could gaze out the window all day... daydreaming about who might be the one... But it would be a waste of time... day dreaming wont find me a husband... unless, possibly, he were to see me standing at my window.

But for now... I will continue to get healthy... because nobody wants to date a sick girl :)

Go ahead and play one of my favorite songs... it's on the sidebar :) I can't remember the first time I heard this song... I think it was sometime in high school... and the words are as true today as the were then... I will not stop praying for my husband... My small group leader encouraged us to start praying for them when we were 13... and I have ever since.

someday. 

xoxo- me